Yet another long week

Why is it so hard for me to ask for help? And when I finally do, feel like I get slapped in the face.

This week has been pretty hard. I guess I should start with Monday when I took the kids up to Hill AFB finally to get eye exams and order Daniel some new glasses. My sister had flown in from Colorado that day and came up and met us at the Hill Aerospace Museum. The kids all had a great time and really loved the airplanes. I'll have to post more about that later.

I then got my sister on base and we went to the BX (kind of like a mini mall/Walmart). They have a little food court there and the kids were starving so I splurged and we went to order something for them to eat. The kids were also very tired which made decision making even harder. As I was helping Daniel figure out what to order, the fire alarm went off. The guy behind the counter said a kid probably pulled it. I look over and there's the alarm pulled with Jonathan standing there. Whoops. The entire building had to be evacuated. We went outside and waited as the fire truck showed up to evaluate and turn off the alarm. Slightly embarrassing.

My dad had parked a trailer in front of our house and as I was going to drop the kids off at a friends house so I could paint the trim, I noticed it was hit. Interact with the police department that day. Three times I think. I'm done with our wonderful emergency personnel this week.

I'm struggling with missing Clay. Sometimes this single parent things is so much harder. This is one of those weeks. We got word that he won't be able to come home for the 4th so I bought tickets to go fly out to see him. I know this isn't the most fiscally responsible thing to do right now but I won't lie--I really need a break. I'm taking Samantha and my wonderful brother and sister in law are stepping in to take my place so I can be gone for about 6 days. I only get to see him for 4 of them and then 2 days of travel but I so need this right now.

Daniel's 8th birthday was yesterday. We had a family reunion we went to but I was able to fix his favorite breakfast and lunch. He was feeling bad that we didn't get him a cake so at 9:30 last night we all went to the grocery store to buy a cake. The woman working there was wonderful and fixed up a prepared cake for Daniel with a transformer tank. I was so grateful. I'm having a hard time pulling myself together for his and Christina's birthdays this year. Big years for both of them and their mom is so out of it. I'm so sorry kids. I hope you forgive me someday.

We came home, I went to change the baby and grandpa and grandma show up. Jonathan decides to be helpful and ends up dropping the cake on the floor. After a little drama, we pulled it together and were eating the fallen cake at 10:30 pm when cousins showed up. Great mom, huh?

We ended up having an extra 9 people at our house last night and spent another long day at the reunion. The kids did fairly well, I think. I let my mamma bear insticts come out when I reached my limit of people discussing my children's problems in front of me. I'm really trying to do this the best I can. I know my kids have issues, all kids do. I just don't need them brought out every time I turn around. I decided I need to work on complimenting positive things I see in other people's children more often. I really am trying to work on my kid's issues and my own too. I'm too tired and exhausted to do this again any time soon. I'm so looking forward to a break. I hope I can get the hotel/rental car stuff figured out soon so I know what I'm doing once I get there.