You'll have to excuse me for a minute. I just need to vent so you don't have to read this. It's just for me.
Last week while I was walking over to pick up a friend's children to watch for the evening, I passed a fellow sister in the ward. She stopped to visit, but it wasn't an uplifting conversation. I know a lot of people think I'm crazy, or that we're crazy. I really don't need people telling me about all the negative that they are certain will befall our family because of our choice of military life. This sister proceeded to tell me how our family will probably be like a family in her extended family and it will tear our family apart. Why do people say stuff like this? How is it supposed to help me feel better about our situation?
It's funny because while Clay was in basic training, I felt that people in our ward didn't really say much of anything. Since I've been to visit him after basic, I've had people tell me all kinds of things that really haven't helped. I've had people tell me that if that were they're husband, they'd kill him. I know these sisters are "more experienced" and lived a much different life from mine, but I really wish that people would be more supportive. This is hard enough WITH positive support. I already have such a hard time asking for help at all. This just makes me want to stay in my own chaos so I don't have to hear comments like this. Why do we have to be so mean to each other?
I really hope that I never say anything like this to others. I guess maybe this experience is just to help me better understand and learn how we need to watch our thoughts and our words. Even if we think something, we really need to give people the benefit of the doubt. I know it's something I still need to work on.
Okay, I'll be quiet now. Maybe I just need to stop talking so I don't offend anyone. Sorry for venting. It's been another long day, I'll have to post what's been going on later when I can handle it better. Time for bed.
3 comments:
Too many people watch "Army Wives" and not enough look at the great examples we have around us. Grandma and Grandpa. Colleen & Randy. Many others. Marriage is what you make it. Family is what you make it. You and Clay have made the best decision for your family (and you did it through prayer, so you have the Big Guy's support as well).
It's your family. It's your decision. Like Melissa said, you and Clay made the best decision for your family, a decision I KNOW wasn't easily or quickly made. Just because they've had negative experiences doesn't mean that ya'll will. I'm proud that Clay is choosing to serve his country, and of you for allowing him to do what is best for your family even though it isn't easy for you to be separated from him. Hang in there, forget what others say.
I would say VENT AWAY!! you need it and you can do it.
I am sorry her comments hurt you. I have only known amazing army families, not just the ones Melissa mentioned but others while we lived in ABQ. It is your (yours and Clay's) decision and no one but you can completely understand it all. I am sure that if you stay close to the Lord he will open the path for you both. Bad days come and go, you have done the best you can.. you have learned from it.
Take it one day at the time, you are a great example to me. Last week I was about to vent on the blog because David was gone and the girls were crazy. Then I thought of you and went back to their room and talk to them and told them how much I love them.
So, thanks, what you are doing now is helping me.
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